I’m from Seattle
I am officially sick of all the articles announcing to the world that Seattle just had the worst year in the history of professional sports. You know what city had a worst season? Every fucking city too shitty to even have a team and I’m looking at you Austin with your bloated festival, the one that has more shitty bands playing on the sidewalks than all the crappy L.A. bands who moved to Seattle in the early 90’s trying to get that a sloppy second record deal. Take your fried plantains and shove them up your pretentious ass, that is if you can remove those way too fucking tight designer jeans. I hope I wasn’t too subtle, if so then I apologize.
I’m from Seattle, now go fuck yourself.